If I am repaired, can we meet again for the first time, in all of the places I have feared to go, and then, again, in all of the places I will have forgotten, if I am repaired?



Saturday, June 30, 2012

On the Sting of Heat

Tragedy struck the broad side of my head yesterday afternoon, wasp-shaped and highly agitated. I make note of it here, only because it was the most memorable of several insults heaped upon the injurious temperature that climbed earlier that morning to 105 degrees and hovered there until well after sunset, when it dropped a blissful two degrees. And, because it’s possibly the most excitement I’ve experienced in a nearly a month.

          Everything being more susceptible to malfunction in heat of this extreme, I wasn’t all too surprised when the dust collection system servicing the shop I’ve been working at on the side, a miserable place no third-world sweat-shopper would set foot in, much less abide, went on the fritz.

          As I’m the only one concerned enough about the health of his lungs to make sure the dust collector is operable and switched on, I took it upon myself to go out to the little detached metal shed housing the unit and attempt to right whatever the heat had wronged.

          The shed is about five by ten, small enough I suppose I should be grateful that the entire brood didn’t swarm my gourd the moment I opened the door. I saw it, a child's paper fist hanging by a thread of spittle in the eaves just above the plate, near a hole in the wall opposite from where I stood. The wasps were of a brown and smallish variety I generally don’t worry about. They seemed complacent enough. So I ventured in.

          The wasps (waspers as the Southerners say) showed me little concern as I fooled with wires, breakers and reset buttons. Little concern, that is, until finally when the machine grudgingly kicked on.

          Again, I suppose I should be grateful only one lone gun was sent out to reprimand me. And I suppose too, I should be grateful that my eyeglasses thwarted the little bastard’s preferred attack on the soft and hairless tissue immediately surrounding the beast’s eyeball, forcing a strike upon my right temple instead.

          I have no idea why the sound of the dust collector that these silly insects reside with daily kicking on would piss them off. But it did. And no, I’m not grateful in the least that only one wasp stung me. One is too many. It hurt like hell. My eyeball is swollen and itchy, despite the deflected sting. And damn is it ever hot.  


  1. a child's paper fist! this is why this story is so damned good, even if it was only one wasp - you wrote it)))

    sorry for your eyeball.

    i had a bee up my nose once stinging. what the hell to do?

    damnanddamn, 105 - that's too damned hottttt!


  2. erin... bee up your nose?! christ! you win. yes, it is crazy hot... and it hasn't rained in a month... everything is tinder brittle. I will say, I'm grateful we aren't ablaze like some.

  3. I enjoyed 105*F this past week from my air-conditioned hovel venturing into the garden in the morning and evenings when the temperature is in the low 80's.
    Our wasp here are "no muy bravo" as my friend in Mexico use to say. At least I think that's what he said. I take no chances and anytime we approach a possible hideout for those semi-hoodlums* I pack at least one pressure can of earth killing, cancer causing, brain deadening chemicals that will reach out 25 feet and touch them causing instant death and poisoning the "child's fist" (some of ours are giants fist). Don't stand under the nest when in the kill mode. I am not worried about my karma at those times. That comes later.
    *I call them semi-hoodlums because they are instrumental around here for pollinating some plants so I'm told. I have seen them going for the nectar on a number of my plants.

  4. Place a wad of chewing bacca on top of the sting, that'll do the trick !
    You are correct...little bastards stung me last year, one red wasp, it took almost three months before the spot was bearable to touch.
    Isn't this heat horrid !
    If we don't get rain in the next few days, we'll all be looking at water rationing..
    Stay as cool as you can, watch out for wasps ;)

  5. There is always something isn't there??.. life going smoothly... that's only in the movies..

    ...glad only one guy left its mark on you... Hope you squished him...

    Wish I could send down some of this fog to cool things off for everybody.
    Take care.

  6. yes Steven Indiana is pretty much in the same boat right now with high temps and hardly any rain. luckily a much needed storm did just go through but i'm not sure how much my area got since i'm on the east coast right now.

    big giant bumble bees are wonderful but i don't trust wasp. ouch!

    i love the part of the childs paper fist.

  7. Oh, Steven. What a nightmare for you. It has reached 68 degrees here in Scotland today and I've the cheek to moan about feeling 'clammy'....*shame*

    You know - I have never been stung in the whole of my life. For over 40 years now, I haven't flailed my arms about while screaming in the company of a wasp/bee as the majority of Scottish females do! I'll gets what's coming one day, I suppose...lol. But my best wishes and quick recovery from the one that dared sunk his ass into you. The little shits know all the sensitive area's, too!

  8. This blog is what I have been missing in my life.

    Also, WHOA. Sure don't miss summer in the south. God's country, my ass..


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