If I am repaired, can we meet again for the first time, in all of the places I have feared to go, and then, again, in all of the places I will have forgotten, if I am repaired?




SC




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Here is the desk drawer in which all of my odds and ends are kept, tidbits that would otherwise never see the light of day.











Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Good Sense



As their investments mounted, the owner’s interest in restoring the old house quickly declined. “We love what you’ve done to the place so far,” they told him, when the house was dried in, its new roof gleaming in the afternoon sun. “We just think…”

     They were kind enough about it, phrased it in such a way that he could almost agree: Spending so much on a place that can’t be lived in or really use for anything at all, didn’t make good sense. It didn’t, either. Acts of love rarely do.

     This is how the past is lost, he thought, loading his tools, discouraged, as much because the owners didn’t care as he couldn’t afford to care. He had a money pit of his own. “I’m sorry,” he told the old house before he left, pressing his hand to its cool brick, listening again to the songs of slaves forged into the clay, the echoes of war, the cries of birth and death.

     How much they were alike, he thought, two faulty old structures, fascinating in all they had survived, unsound and unable to make their own repairs. Fascinating, but not worth the act of charity that might save them from ruin. Good sense. They would never make good sense.

    

6 comments:

  1. Oh, man...

    I can feel your angst here... I know that old buildings and such don't have a soul, per se, but they do have a presence...

    You are right, that's how the Past and History is lost... we only remember the remnants and the talking points...

    ~shoes~

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  2. I am sorry Steven. I know you put a lot of work into that old house.

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  3. That's the kind of time we live in right now, I'm afraid...
    Insight will come, I suppose, I just hope not to late.

    ... you write as a genious though. you keep getting better, "finer".


    stephanie

    stephanie

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  4. I still miss my childhood house dreadfully!

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  5. I love to drive around to view old houses. When I stop in to see a place that contains a lot of old photo's from this area. I was amazed at all the beautiful houses this area once had. I can understand how you are feeling.

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  6. Oh I have seen this so many times. sometimes they justify it by saying they want to "leave it just as papa left it" and it slowly goes down over the next few years... right before your eyes.. sure some people would never notice. but to whom it does matter, we notice the loss. we noticed what could have been, never happen. it is hard to stay unattached.

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