Here's What I Do...



I cut wood, because, after all, I am that much of a man, wink wink, and I don’t wear my boots, and the chainsaw spews chips onto and into my low-topped shoes where they fix themselves by the thousands in my socks, which I then throw into the washer, who, magically displaces the chips from my socks into my underwear—a tedious task I’m guessing—but nonetheless this is why I itch sometimes… down there… in case you wondered.