If I am repaired, can we meet again for the first time, in all of the places I have feared to go, and then, again, in all of the places I will have forgotten, if I am repaired?



Wednesday, January 12, 2011


The piano is gone; delivered. I’m going to take a break from the shop to clean house. The dust, you know.

   You know.


   Y. O. U.

   I wonder if YOU was the first word that I learned to spell. It feels like the first when I spell it out loud: old and worn and comfortable in my mouth; older than D.O.G. or C.A.T. or even A.N.D. or T.H.E.

   Why didn't I cherish the first word that I learned to spell more? Like I did the memory of Cecilia, who became so dear in one summer and then was gone, or my best Christmas ever, or mastering time and shoe laces.

   I want my first word; to set on a shelf, among my other curios and photographs and bits of memorabilia. I feel like I should go back and thank it, like I should have done that teacher who taught it to me, had I the chance when the thought occurred.

   Perhaps if I clean I’ll find it: That first word. There’s so much dust you know.


   Y. O. U.

   Where are you?


  1. I'm pretty sure my first word would have been "chocolade".
    If only it had been shorter.

  2. I think the first word I learned to spell was either "CAT" or my name (all in capital letters of course; in my youth I thought I could get through life without having to learn lower-case and cursive.)

    I can't really remember much about that first word, because when I was young I didn't care much for words. I liked books, but I was going to be an artist, not a librarian.

    I do remember the first book I read on my own, though. It was called "Max the Cat," and had a stripy orange tabby on the front cover.

  3. Stephanie...

    I wonder if chocolate would taste the same, had it a shorter name.


    Had you chosen architecture or some similar area of design, requiring drafting, you could have. We take great pride in our upper cases.

    My first book was called 'Puppies and Kittens'... One of the few from my childhood that I possess. Not much of a read, very, 'See Spot run.' But it has wonderful illustrations.

  4. I used to tell everyone that my first word was 'alligator.'


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